Sunday, March 11, 2012

Expect the Unexpected!!

Hello from Pisac, Peru and not the jungle!
I think it is nearly impossible to write all that has happened to me in the past five days since the last blog posting. I don't know where to begin and as I am trying so hard to focus and keep in the present perhaps the best thing is for me to simply say that the jungle journey has been postponed and instead I am having, tonight, a minor jungle experience here in the mountains. I will be having an Ahayuasca ceremony with a beautiful female shaman called Karen, a ceremony where my intention is to simply connect on a way deeper level with God, the light, the source of my own healing power and now surrender to wherever this journey is to lead me.

This morning as I was reading in the little monastic cell in the guest house where I am now staying I found this...

If you have been trying to heal a disease or defect in your physical body forget these efforts and  be at peace. Ignore such appearances as best you can and lie back singing in the everlasting arms. The healing will come spontaneously as your consciousness floats upward to touch the edge of mine.

I find these words extraordinary and they seem to resonate with how I am now feeling. I am at peace, more than at peace, I am truly full of joy and I just want to let my laughter bubble up even more. I am no longer choosing to go racing around for a cure, a fix,  or an end to this process. What I have learnt and gained is beyond words and now the story has to change. So I am changing it tonight with this ceremony. I know change does not happen overnight but I do believe you can have a mega conscious click of clarity and that is already happening to me.

So I shall no longer listen to the fears and dramas of others. I know my body better than any physician I have encountered and despite being told the cancer is in my bones, my lungs, my lymph system and there is something wrong with my head, I feel fabulous!! So as long as I am feeling like this then I shall take life again in my arms, reclaim my power and put all my energy into creating a healing centre wherever I am guided to do so. The how and the where and the money and all the details are not my problem for I know if this is to be manifested through me then it will be. So I am turning a page and beginning a new chapter. I have no idea how many chapters there will be nor how many pages are in my book of life but I shall turn a new page every day filling it with as much love and laughter and joy as I possibly can for this is the only way I can now walk.

I know I will leave perhaps a few friends by the wayside who cannot or will not understand the way I am dealing with this but it is my walk and no one else´s and I shall walk it in the very best way I can. None of us know when our last day will be upon this incredible planet but thanks to the gift of all that has happened to me or maybe all I have created I have the chance, for the remaining time I am down here, to live a dance with death and life in a way I have never danced before. And no one is going to stop this dance with their fears and doubts and their shadow stuff which blocks the light I feel so strongly inside me. 

I will create a Light House somewhere on this planet, a place where people who can be nurtured, respected and honoured for choosing a wilder path of healing which so few people truly understand. This is pioneer stuff but what a fantastic way to end my time down here creating this vision and who knows, through the creation of it I may be down here for years and years and still be writing this blog!! You never know. Life is a total mystery for all of us and the past few days have shown me that more than ever. I should have been in Spain by now or even in the jungle but no,  I am here, in the mountains and who knows what is going to happen to me tomorrow!! I have learnt to expect the unexpected and welcome it into my life and I suggest it might be a good idea for you as well to do the same!! I tell you one thing for sure, life is never boring.

So until I write again I wish you a wonderful evening and hope that loads of unexpected things creep into your life tomorrow too!!!
With love Emilyxxxx

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